With pregnancy and delivery (surgery) and now the newborn phase nearly behind me, I am feeling energized and excited for what lies ahead… I’ve been thinking a lot about what I want life to look like for myself, my family, my career, and reevaluating what really matters to me. I wanted to write them all down not only to share with you all but to keep myself accountable! You’ll notice the theme of the year basically revolves around, dare I say, wellness. I realized recently I turn 35 this year and have two baby boys to keep up with and a company to run. I need energy. I need to stop getting sick ALL THE TIME. I want to be the healthier version of me I can be both mentally and physically.
Note: I’m not sharing any work goals here as things we have planned and in the works are not my news to share!
I also don’t have anything with travel on my list this year as I don’t see much of that happening with the expense of a new house and the two little ones. I think it’ll be more fun when they’re both a little bit older so any travel we have planned is local – ie probably a lake house in Michigan this summer. Hah actually that’s all we have planned.
All of that being said, here’s my 10 personal goals for 2020… accompanied by a mini photo shoot Dan took of me and the boys in our favorite pajamas… so grateful for phones that can capture such pretty pictures! My pajamas are the flannel plaid from Serena and Lily which are currently on super sale – I literally came down the stairs in the them and said out loud “well THESE are a treat!” Hah so soft. Plus they run big and I love my pajamas extra cozy. I’m wearing a medium which I usually am but these have plenty of room to spare so you might even want to size down. The boys are in my favorite kiddie jammies, organic cotton onesies from Mori. Cozy slippers were a Christmas gift and Henry’s bean bag chair is from RHbaby.
1. Be present with my family.
The first two months with both boys – really the first month – was very difficult for me. I blogged about this already and explained there were a number of factors that made it that way, but pretty much every week since Charlie was around 7-8 weeks has gotten significantly easier and better. Even right now it’s 7pm, both boys are in bed, and Dan and I are working. The last two nights we were able to get through an entire movie together! Rewind to weeks 2-6 of newborn life and getting Charlie down at night was a job that lasted anywhere from 30-120 minutes standing, shushing, rocking, pacing, him crying, oven vent blasting… it was stressful and tough and I missed having this alone time with Dan in the evenings. I was also healing from surgery, not able to hold Henry, and just not myself physically which made me not myself emotionally.
Now that things are getting more routine, we’ve adjusted to life with two, Charlie is adapting more to the outside world, etc., I’m so so excited for the years that lay ahead… starting with this one. I love having my two boys. I love and feel so grateful that our family feels whole. People have asked if I regret having them so close together and I can truly say I don’t. Even though that first month or two was tough – I am so excited that they’ll be close in age and have each other as best buddies. Also seeing how fast Henry is growing up makes me want to soak up every minute, every snuggle, every bedtime, every tantrum, every smile, every funny thing they say and do, every cry for “mama.” I know how fast it’s all going to go and I want to be present for it.
2. Get in Shape – preferably by swimming or getting outdoors
With two little boys, we’ve already seen how we need an abundance of energy and that will just grow as the boys grow and get more active. I really want to get in shape not just for myself but for them. I want to be an active family, outside, playing sports and doing activities. Plus, now that I’m done having kids, I’m ready and determined to get my body to a place I feel good about it. Swimming is my favorite activity but I also want to jog outside and get a double jogging stroller for springtime (once Charlie is old enough to ride in one).
3. Continue to introduce Henry and Charlie to different hobbies
I really want to keep doing new things with Henry – and eventually Charlie – to let him explore different avenues of fun. See what he likes. We’ve had a lot of fun painting and cooking together. We’re going to sign him up for Little Kickers next month – he’s great at kicking the ball already and we think he’ll really love that. Getting back into swimming class too.
4. Move to the suburbs.
This is a goal of ours this year for a number of reasons… namely we want a back yard and want to be closer to grandparents and cousins and friends. It means I’ll have a commute to work but very willing to make that work if it means we find a long term house!
5. Blog at least once a week
Yes – I am setting the bar low. But considering how I rarely blogged this year, 52 posts would be a huge step up! Attainable goals – that’s the name of the game in my book. I have SO many posts I’ve wanted to do and just didn’t make time for and I truly miss it! I love blogging. Sharing projects, and interests, and favorite finds, and things happening in my life with you. Plus we’ll hopefully have a new house which has always been my favorite content to share–design projects and hopefully some renovating!
6. Cut back significantly on dairy and bread/pasta
I eat a lot of cheese. And bread. And I LOATHE diets because I think they’re a temporary torture system that comes undone as soon as you’re off. I looked up the rules to Whole30 and personally find it ridiculous that something would tell you to not eat quinoa but eat as much meat as you want… that was not going to work for me.
I did recently decide however to try and cut back on dairy after getting my first HORRIFIC migraine just before Christmas. I’ve always had sinus issues and gotten bad sinus headaches, but this was another level. I spoke with someone who also suffers from sinus migraines and she suggested cutting back on dairy – I was eating a decent amount of it. Nachos for lunch, Amy’s kale bake mac n cheese (delicious), cheese and crackers, cream cheese on bagels, oh you name it. Not. healthy. After that migraine and her advice, I went a week without it – it was shockingly easy. Anything to avoid another migraine! I’m not eliminating it ENTIRELY but it won’t be a large part of any meal. A tiny bit here and there because again I really believe in moderation.
Same thing with bread and pasta. Too frequently I’ve had a bagel for breakfast. I started eating a lot more pasta at dinner because I make it for Henry and it’s easy. I want to try some of the healthy alternatives like cauliflower rice and pasta. I’ll keep you updated on this one!
This goal really falls in line with my desire to just be healthier and have more energy – mainly for my boys and my family and my work. The night I had that migraine I couldn’t take care of my boys and that sucked.
7. Start taking vitamins.
I don’t. I wasn’t even great about my prenatal this last pregnancy. I’m not getting any younger – I just realized I turn 35 this year (how did that happen?!). So anything for a stronger, healthier me. Any recommendations?!
8. Start dating my husband again
I feel very lucky that I can enthusiastically say I’m wildly, crazy in love with my husband. He’s the best. This year will be seven years together and a smile from him across a crowded room still makes me as excited as it did the night we met. Of course with babies and our jobs and a home to take care of and a dog and life – we haven’t had as much one-on-one time recently. Even last year, we were together in our family room hanging out pretty much EVERY night, but we rarely went out together. That required hiring a babysitter. I am excited and eager to get back to one on one time. Doing fun things. We were just reminiscing about the breakfast dates we used to have before kids. Being closer to grandparents will make sneaking away for a dinner date much easier once we move.
9. Reconnect with my girlfriends
Similarly – I feel like I barely saw my girlfriends last year. Everyone is busy, yes. But I miss them. We try to do a monthly dinner but Dan and I missed so many of them last year – namely because of finding a babysitter or someone was probably sick. I really want to make it a priority to see them as often; and if not in person, be better about checking in.
10. Meditate/relax/take baths/whatever that looks like
I want to reduce my stress levels this year. I am a worrier at my very core and have the grey hairs to prove it. Or just ask anyone who has ever met me. Stress is so so toxic to the body, and I want to do anything to shift my innate tense, over-planning, anxious physicality to a more relaxed, take-deep-breaths, play it by ear version of me… I love that my new watch has a setting to give you “breathe” reminders where you pause and take deep breaths for a minute throughout the day. That will be step one. Again – if you have any tips or favorite apps/practices/books/podcasts/vitamins/CBD product haha – anything! I’m all ears.